Medical History

Medical History

I believe it was Churchill who observed

history is written by the victors

delivered, one imagines, dryly with

a dash of pith, an ounce or two of gin,

the words clipped and formed in the space above

his derby-ed chalk hill dome from gathering

clouds of ominous blue cigar smoke, all

veddy proper, tickety-boo and all

that rot, a life insurance policy,

after all, read in a British accent

is boilerplate made sublime, all this

as I sit in this waiting room checking

off little boxes, dare I say, writing

my medical history, to be read

aloud in the event of my demise

by Englishmen, Bill Nighy perhaps on

the subject of my LDL levels,

Patrick Stewart breathing life into our

family's penchant for colon cancer or

Gary Oldham giving a dignified

reading from the list of male fore-bearers

to have toppled headlong over the pale

clutching their chests.  Perhaps Steve Coogan

or some surviving Python could coax a

chuckle at the expense of my total

hip replacement, snatching victory from

the jaws of inevitable defeat.